What’s Wrong with Being Confident?

Jennifer Lawrence has been in the news lately for a post she wrote for Lenny, Lena Dunham’s latest creation. The post is titled “Why Do I Make Less Than My Male Co-Stars?” It’s short and to the point, which is that pay gap is still very real, regardless of the scale (it’s possible Jennifer and I may be in different tax brackets…). And it’s not just the pay gap – it’s the expectations around our behavior. When it comes to negotiating, sharing our ideas or stating an opinion, we’re too busy trying to be liked to be as effective as we could be. While certainly not a universal truth for all women everywhere in every scenario, this issue obviously hit close to home for many of us, given all the attention her post is receiving.

I’ve been pretty neutral on most things Demi Lovato up to this point, but her newest song is my jam. And while this might seem wholly unrelated to Jennifer Lawrence’s post, bear with me. Confident is the second release off Demi’s upcoming album of the same name. It’s no secret that I love a good pop anthem, and this song doesn’t disappoint. But in the middle of the strong bass line and ridiculously catchy tune, she asks a good question – what’s wrong with being confident? Her chorus goes a little something like this:

So you say I’m complicated
That I must be outta my mind
But you’ve had me underrated
What’s wrong with being confident?

It’s a good reminder for me to not let others define who I am (plus, the song is just fun). And that’s Jennifer’s point, too – we define our value. As women, more often that not, we need to remind others that they’ve underrated us. Yes, it’s not fair and it’s ridiculous that we need to do any reminding at all. But until that changes, there’s not a damn thing wrong with being confident.